Life is stressful and finding time to relax can be challenging. We all have that Yogi friend who loves to shove her Yogagram pics in your face, babbling on about the benefits of touching her toes while eating a gluten-free granola bar. Yoga is indeed good for the mind, soul and body – why else have humans been stretching on mats for the past 5000 years? But practicing yoga is not all Namaste and essential oils. Here are a few things you need to know about yoga:
Deezer has an amazing yoga playlist
You’ll need to take out a loan
Yoga is expensive y’all. Unless you’re dangerously craning your neck trying to follow a YouTube video at home, expect to pay at least $20 for a 40 minute class. So focus, just not on your bank account.
Yoga is not easy
It’s really not as easy at is looks. Inverted Lotus, Cobra, Halfmoon… and there goes my back.
You will find peace and tranquility
Working through a yoga class for an hour may seem boring, but once you get out it’s like walking on air.
…Providing you stay in your own bubble.
There’s always someone who practices yoga like their life depended on it. They’re more flexible than you, they’re better looking than you, they’re more spiritual than you, more annoying than you and above all, always sat next to you.
You don’t need overpriced Yoga pants
In the same category of high-performing yogaphiles, are the people who dress better than you. They strut around in their $95 Sweaty Betty pants while you’ve just noticed a gaping crotch hole in your Target leggings.
You’ll be proud when you manage a pose
When you manage a pose others find hard to achieve, you will be smug with satisfaction. Little do they know that afterwards you’ll be crouching in your shower from sciatic nerve pain.
Foot cramps. The scourge of the Earth.
Resting positions are the best
Try staying “present & awake” in child’s pose. Just give me a blanket already!
There will be farts… lots of them
Your neighbour’s unexpected gas attack, right in your face
You’ll be a tiny bit intolerant
You’ll secretly despise anyone who practices Yoga, except for yourself of course.
Avoid using Namaste outside of class.
You may cringe at friends who greet you in Starbucks with “Namaste”. If you are one of them, know that calling yourself a Yogi is the most pretentious thing you can name yourself. You practice Yoga before eating tacos with friends at a restaurant, you certainly haven’t dedicated your life to it in rural India. Practice what you preach as they say.
Yoga is pretty amazing
Yoga improves your health, muscle strength, posture and general better-personness. Just don’t flatulate in your friend’s face, practice yoga like a competition, and always remember to not give a damn about anyone else in the room.
Listen to our perfect playlists for Yoga practice on Deezer. Namaste, people!